Thursday, August 13, 2009

Dear Mormon Bachelor Pad:

Can we be friends?

My attractiveness level is in the 6.7-8.2 range. My coolness level is a solid 9.5. I give spectacular back scratches during sacrament meeting, but I do require one in return. I can appreciate a little scruff in the facial hair department. I laugh at most funny things, and I have loads of attractive girl friends.

I look forward to your response.

Sincerely,
Bekah



7 reader comments:

Jaime Van Hoose Steele said...

Beks your attractiveness is not between 6.7-8.2...it's at least 7.3-8.6

Also, don't you think this mormon bachelor pad sounds a lot like maxims??

Craig Barlow B. said...

How do you know you aren't already friends with them Bekah!? Dundun! Maxim is actually one of the people who asked me if I write it, which is either proof of innocence or a very sneaky mafia-esque trick. I think the real key is: who do we know that went on their mission to Ireland?

Craig Barlow B. said...

However, I don't think it's Maxim's... just so you know my thoughts.

Craig Barlow B. said...

... but I wouldn't rule it out. -

This is what has become of me since we haven't played Mafia in months. This is what I have to do to satisfy my need for skepticism! I have a lot of unspent suspicion. Why, why aren't we playing this game more often?!

Anonymous said...

Dear Bekah,

I'm pretty sure we can be friends. Because our identities are secret we will have to go about meeting all sneaky like. How about you let me know the time and place your singles ward meets. You wear something conspiquois... I don't know, hooker boots or a granny hat, and we will add you to our ward hopping list. Once we find you we'll have Aaron do all the work. Piece of cake... Plan?

Mormon Bachelor Pad

Mormon Bachelor Pad said...

Oops, that really was me.

Rebekah said...

Dear MBP:

I have prayed long and hard about this and I have come to the conclusion that hooker boots or a granny hat would not be in my best interest. Instead I will be wearing a red dress and fabulous shoes.

Aaron's skills will not be required.

U41 10:50 North Chapel

Your new friend,
-Bekah